Short Storyish thing, please review

Try your skills at writing. A place for any non-Harry Potter fan fiction or writing of your own. Write your own original fan fics or even a completely original story here.

Moderators: DucksRMagical, Un'Anima Persa

Short Storyish thing, please review

Postby Sacred Guardian » Saturday 17 January 2004 12:27:13am

hey, i had to write this for english, and my class thought it was really good, so tell me what you think.

The Lines That Take Me Back
Line. Line. Line. Line. Line. The lines never end. Down the road. Do they ever stop? They show the way to where ever you are going. They always know the way. The lines are nice. They are guides through rain and snow.
Today the lines take me back to a place I sword I’d never go again. They took me away the last time I left. I do not want to go but I must. Today we must add another to the accumulation of people that I’ll never see again.
He is gone. He has gone on to be with the others. I am the only one left. When I end up here without coming, there will be none of us left. It is a lonely feeling. I am by myself. I can not last long on my own.
It will soon be my time.
User avatar
Sacred Guardian
Hufflepuff Prefect, Hufflepuff Chaser and Hogwarts' Master of Secrets
 
Posts: 1894
Joined: Tuesday 18 February 2003 11:21:10pm
Location: Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry

Postby pinky p » Monday 19 January 2004 6:01:38am

i liked it... it made me think :grin: things that make me think are good, cuz a lot of things don't :D
pinky p
Supreme Pie-Eater, Registered Animagus (Platypus) and Princess of All Pink Grapefruit
 
Posts: 2672
Joined: Tuesday 19 August 2003 9:59:49pm
Location: either swimming, sleeping, eating, or doing schoolwork... my life these days

Postby Sacred Guardian » Monday 19 January 2004 8:24:45pm

thank you, everyone in my class liked it too
User avatar
Sacred Guardian
Hufflepuff Prefect, Hufflepuff Chaser and Hogwarts' Master of Secrets
 
Posts: 1894
Joined: Tuesday 18 February 2003 11:21:10pm
Location: Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry

Postby Meg Boyd » Wednesday 28 January 2004 3:55:19am

I love it...it also made me think...wow...
User avatar
Meg Boyd
Head Girl, Ravenclaw Prefect and Maker of Witty Random Statements Since 1986 A.D.
 
Posts: 1946
Joined: Tuesday 1 July 2003 2:14:00am
Location: The Guilt Show

Postby Ginny Malfoy » Thursday 29 January 2004 3:44:50am

Is there more to it? I like it. :)
User avatar
Ginny Malfoy
Fully Qualified Wizard
 
Posts: 186
Joined: Tuesday 30 December 2003 1:04:42am
Location: Reading in the Slytherin Common Room...YES, we DO know how to read! :p

Postby Sacred Guardian » Tuesday 3 February 2004 3:36:26am

thank you, no more right now, but i'm thinking about taking it into a book(either the begining or the very end), though i might have to alter it a bit
User avatar
Sacred Guardian
Hufflepuff Prefect, Hufflepuff Chaser and Hogwarts' Master of Secrets
 
Posts: 1894
Joined: Tuesday 18 February 2003 11:21:10pm
Location: Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry

Postby Ferrus » Wednesday 17 March 2004 8:29:06pm

very nice. made think, which is a nice change.
User avatar
Ferrus
Fully Qualified Wizard
 
Posts: 1066
Joined: Sunday 18 January 2004 1:50:04pm
Location: Returned from the Land of Temporal Oblivion


Return to Other Fan Fiction and Writing

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests

cron